Writing

Descriptive Writing

WALHTs:
  • use adjectives to describe
  • use similes and metaphors to describe

The purpose of our writing this week is to write a narration about a bald eagle hunting for a salmon. We will need to be very descriptive and use some of our new learning to do this. Watch the video below very carefully and notice what the eagle is doing at each stage of his hunt. 


 http://www.bbc.co.uk/naturesgreatevents/



  • What do we need to know before we begin to write?
  • How can we best describe what the eagle is doing?
  • How can we best inform the viewer?
  • What do I know how to do as an author that will help me do this?
  • What will I need to learn how to do?


We will be recording our narration with the video clip and publishing it to our blog. Do we need to ask for permission to use this video clip? Why/ why not?



TERM 3  WEEK 2

Our first mission for writing at the beginning of term 3, is to build on our learning from term 2. We will be working collaboratively to describe a chosen image using our words to paint the picture in our reader's minds.


Watch the following videos to help you understand the difference between a simile and a metaphor.



What did you learn?

What would you like to know more about?

How will using similes and metaphors in your writing help improve it?





Look carefully at the images. What do you see?
  • How does the image make you feel?
  • I wonder what is happening?
  • I wonder what happened before the image was taken?
  • What adjectives best describe what you see?
  • How does the image stir your imagination?


Images sourced from http://www.literacyshed.com

We will be working together to think of some adjectives, similes and metaphors that paint a picture in our reader's minds in class.

The following websites have tools that can help you edit and improve your writing.

https://prowritingaid.com
http://www.hemingwayapp.com
http://editminion.com/#


Information Report


WALHTs:

  • write an information report
  • write detailed sentences
  • use a variety of sentence starters.
On Tuesday we will begin to learn how to write a report about trees using the information we have collected. After you have written your report you will choose how you will present your report. Look at the resources below to help your learning.


    
Writing sample from http://dera.ioe.ac.uk/4825/2/nls_y6t1exunits075202report.pdf

 

To help you take notes go to the rolling link to find out how.

   Using Vivid Verbs

WALHTs:

  • add vivid verbs to our complex sentences
  • use different sentence starters including vivid verbs, AAAWWUBBIS, adverbs and nouns
Watch the following video clips to learn about adverbs.






As you can see, adverbs can tell us a lot about verbs. Your challenge is not only to include vivid verbs in your writing, but to also include adverbs too! This week we will also be practising what we learned about writing complex sentences.

Your Mission:

  • write at least 1 descriptive paragraph (or 2 or 3) recounting your try-athlon or duathlon experience,
  • remember to include a beginning, middle and end to your experience,
  • pick just one snapshot in time to describe, i.e. swimming, the run, the bike,
  • include complex sentences,
  • use different sentence starters. For example begin your sentences with verbs, AAAWWUBBIS, nouns and adverbs,
  • don't forget to use your spyglass to "shush" and edit.



Writing Simple, Complex and Compound Sentences

WALHTs:
  • write simple, complex and compound sentences
  • use different sentence starters using verbs, AAAWWUBBIS, adverbs and nouns

Watch the video clip on the link below. Try the experiments yourself.






What did you notice?

  • What did you do?
  • What did you wonder?
  • What happened when you.....?
Write notes to these questions and anything I may have missed into your writer's notebooks. 


Watch the video clip below to help you learn about writing complex sentences.



Write an example of a complex sentence and post it as a comment. 

Your Mission:

  • write a descriptive paragraph (or 2) recounting what you did and what you found out,
  • use different sentence types- simple, complex and compound,
  • use different sentence starters. For example begin your sentences with verbs, AAAWWUBBIS, nouns and adverbs,
  • use adjectives to describe something,
  • make sure you you use capital letters and full stops correctly.
Examples of sentence types

Simple sentences have a subject and a verb, 1 complete idea.

Mrs Large ran a hot bath.

Complex sentences have one main idea and at least one extra phrase or clause to give more information about the main point.


She emptied half a bottle of bath bubbles into the water, plonked on her bath hat and got in.

From ‘Five Minutes Peace ‘, by Jill Murphy 


Compound sentences are made up of simple sentences joined by connectives.

Connectives are words which link or join up ideas to build compound or complex sentences.



When she spoke her teeth were quite big and stuck out a bit, but I put all thoughts of Bugs Bunny imitations out of my head. 

From ‘The Lottie Project’ by Jacqueline Wilson 



Thank you to:

http://pesking.blogspot.co.nz
http://www.bbc.co.uk/norfolk/kids/kuwtc_pack2.PDF


Production Brochure

WALHTs:
  • identify the language features of a persuasive text;
  • structure a brochure: headings, sub-headings, bullet points, graphics;
  • identify the purpose of informational text in the form of a brochure;

This week we will be creating a brochure to inform and sell our Reaching for the stars production to our community.

Watch the following Youtube clip to learn about different language features that are used to persuade readers to attend our school production.




What Did You Notice?
  • What is a rhetorical question?
  • What is emotive language?
  • Why do we use the rule of 3?
  • How can we use punctuation for effect?
  • Are there any other ways you could persuade your readers and what are they?
  • Is there anything you are not sure about and need clarification?

Write a comment discussing what you have noticed, what you know how to do and what you may need help with understanding.


Click the link below to read more tips on how to write a brochure.

http://www.wikihow.com/Write-Brochures

Use the brochure template to help you plan your brochure advertising our production.

We will co-construct our success criteria in class.

Lets Show, Not Tell

WALTs:
  • know how to use words that shows my reader without directly telling them my idea.
  • know how to use commas to write an interrupted sentence.
  • know and understand why it is important to use capital letters and full stop accurately.
  • know how to write a description of a person.
Watch the following video clip to help with your writing this week.




        What did you notice?

  • What do you already do well?
  • What will you need to include in your writing?
  • What did you find interesting?
  • What will you need to practise?
  • What might you need help with?
Write a comment explaining what you have noticed and how this will help with your writing.


Interrupters!

When a group of words interrupts a sentence, it needs to have commas on both sides. Use two commas to show the information that is not necessarily needed in the sentence.

Jeff Anderson: Mechanically Inclined.



Models:

Only Howie, who was growling as he chewed vigorously on a rawhide bone, seemed unable to relax.

James Howe, The Celery Stalks at Midnight.


Her face, scrunched up and wrinkled, was covered by a tattered straw hat. 



Now we are ready to write!




Choose one of the following photos and think about the following:
  • What did they do?
  • How are they feeling and why?
  • What are they thinking?
  • What kind of person are they (character traits)?
  • What has happened?
  • What do they like/ dislike?
  • What do they look like?
Write your thoughts in your writer's jotting book.









 














How Bizarre

Now that we have written a modern Hinemoa and Tutanekai myth, we need to write a song to go with our movie.

WALTS:
  • know how to write lyrics to music that expresses an idea
  • know how to include rhyme for effect
  • know the structure of a song includes verses, and a chorus

Using the music sung and written by Paul Fuemana (OMC) as a model, write your own lyrics about your modern day Hinemoa and Tutanekai. Use the myth you have written to help you create your lyrics for your song. 

Carefully read the lyrics below to help you structure your song.


How Bizarre

Brother Pele's in the back, sweet Zina's in the front
Cruisin' down the freeway in the hot, hot sun
Suddenly red-blue lights flash us from behind
Loud voice booming, "Please step out onto the line"
Pele preaches words of comfort, Zina just hides her eyes
Policeman taps his shades, "Is that a Chevy '69?"

How bizarre
How bizarre, how bizarre

Destination unknown, as we pull in for some gas
Freshly pasted poster reveals a smile from the past
Elephants and acrobats, lions snakes monkey
Pele speaks "righteous," Sister Zina says "funky"

How bizarre
How bizarre, how bizarre

Ooh, baby (Ooh, baby)
It's making me crazy (It's making me crazy)
Everytime I look around
Everytime I look around (Everytime I look around)
Everytime I look around
It's in my face

Ring master steps out and says "the elephants left town"
People jump and jive, but the clowns have stuck around
TV news and camera, there's choppers in the sky
Marines, police, reporters ask where, for and why
Pele yells, "We're outta here," Zina says, "Right on"
We're making moves and starting grooves before they knew we were gone
Jumped into the Chevy and headed for big lights
Wanna know the rest? Hey, buy the rights...

How bizarre
How bizarre, how bizarre

Ooh, baby (Ooh, baby)
It's making me crazy (It's making me crazy)
Everytime I look around
Everytime I look around (Everytime I look around)
Everytime I look around
It's in my face
Writer: FUEMANA, PAUL / JANSSON, ALAN LEO
Copyright: Lyrics © Universal Music Publishing Group


What did you notice?

Post a comment explaining what you have noticed about the structure of the song.





Now that you know the structure listen to the music to help you write your song.





Hinemoa and Tutanekai 

This week we will be taking the legend about Tutanekai and Hinemoa and modernising it. We began by reading the book Swim and identified some of the features we noticed about legends last week. We have also created a character profile of Tutanekai and planned our legend by breaking it down in to the different parts of the story: setting the scene, problem, solution and end.

WALTS:
  • know the features of a legend
  • know how to transfer our previous learning into different style of writing
  • know how to set the scene and include a problem, solution and end in my legend
  • use the model to guide my writing

Watch the following video made by Swinemoor Primary School to help you with the features of a legend. You can skip the parts you do not need.




What did you notice?


  • What features will you need to include?
  • Are there any differences when you compare the video to our shared book Swim?
  • Is there anything you will need to change in your plan?
  • What have you already included?
We will share our ideas in class and decide on a success criteria together.


We Play Hard!

This week we will be describing how we play hard in a sport we play using a model written by Kiwi author, Patricia Grace.


WALTs:
·       How to write a listing sentence that has strong verbs.        
·       How to punctuate using commas.
·       How to punctuate using a semi colon.

    
     I can’t wait to get on the field and get stuck into the game; I really go for it. I watch the ball and chase it all over the place. Where the ball goes, I go. I tackle, handle, kick, run, everything. I do everything I can think of and I feel good. Sometimes it’s cold and muddy and when I get thrown down into the mud and come up mucky I feel great, because all the mud shows that I’ve made a game of it. The dirtier I get the better I feel I like it because I don’t want to miss out on anything.

Author: Patricia Grace, Beans


This video may help you with using commas.




What did you Notice?


How has the author "hooked" you in?
What effect does the listing sentence have on this piece of writing?
What are the other uses of commas?
Is there anything you found interesting or you don't understand?

Think about these questions and post a comment on the blog about your new learning.

It's All About Me.

WALTs: 
  • identify the features of a bio-poem
  • know how to write a bio-poem that describes us.   
  • know how to write to the format of a bio-poem
Week 1 we will be writing a bio-poem to describe ourselves. We will be learning the features and format of a bio-poem. Because it's term 3 you will also be expected to write a bio-poem about a buddy too! After all we have been together for a half a year so we should know each other. 

The following video will give you glimpse into what we will be doing and give you an opportunity to think about who you are. 




          What did you notice?

We will be discussing what you noticed in class. Write a comment so we have a starting point for discussion. What has the author used to describe themselves? Is there anything you found interesting or you don't understand? How could we improve on this model?



Thank you melulater for this great idea :)



Improve your vocabulary





Procedural Writing

Purpose: 

  • write instructions on how to make a jumping frog
  • to write a method for a science experiment.

WALT....

  • know how to write clear instructions that are sequenced in order.




What did you notice? 


Discuss the features of procedural writing with Whaea Piri and record in our modelling book. Make a comment on what you have learned. I look forward to hearing about your new learning.


What's Next?

Watch the following YouTube clip that shows you how to make an origami jumping frog. Make the frog and then write the instructions to teach other students how to make them. 









What do you need to remember?

Success Criteria:



  • Purpose of your instructions. For Example: How to make a jumping frog.
  • Equipment you will need.
  • Sequence what you did in order.
  • Used connecting words such as, first, then, next, finally. You can also use numbers to show the correct sequence.
  • Verbs are used to give commands. For example: cut, fold, twist, place, pour.
  • Simple present tense is used.
  • Technical language is used. For example: PVA glue, Borax, 
  • Detailed information given. For example: How- carefully fold, hold tightly, use scissors. Where- from the top. When- after it has changed colour.

What next?

Publish your instructions using pages and place on the server so Whaea Piri can print them out to place on our Author's Arcade wall.

Revisit your learning with Whaea Piri. Now you are ready to independently write your method for our crazy putty experiment. 


Story Book Writing

This week we are beginning to learn about how to write a story book for the junior students in our school. We will be learning about the features of an effective story book. Our learning this week will involve noticing, planning, character traits, drafting and 'shushing' our writing.

First of all you will use the TagCloud app to publish your own character traits. Look at the list of character traits to help you. Please edit your list for spelling mistakes. Enter words into TagCloud and save to camera roll. Your words will look something like this.



Features of an Effective Story Book

  • It has a plot, setting, characters, problem, solution.
  • The events are sequenced in order.
  • Characters are described through their actions and dialogue.
  • Sentences are short and simple.
  • Strong verbs are used to paint a picture in the reader's mind.
  • Some phrases can be repeated for effect.
  • The illustrations are attractive, colourful and help tell the story.

34 comments:

  1. wow , the tap cloud app is really cool .All you need to do is write 3 lines of words in your jotters notebook , then you type them and you then chose the type of writing style you want . Your done ! Mrs T , this is awesome...

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  2. This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

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  3. tab cloud is an awesome app to use, you should get it because it's good for your posters or flyers with word on it like up above of what is going to happening or like posters for a market with words for example: food music fun games stores and lots more fun this is my opinion for getting this app.To do a tag cloud is simple its just 3 easy step no:1, draft your words down on a paper or charecter traits eg: calm brave strong helpful positive ect ect no;2 write your words on the app and step no:3 colour and create. Sooooo get this app :)

    Happy Blogging:)

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  4. that is the coooolest video that I've ever on the blog miss T I wished I'll have a blog like you so I hope lots of people around the world see my videos too.

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  5. Wow! Mrs T I really like how you been creative and made your own video. And I would like to make my own video
    like you so everyone could see!!

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  6. Tag cloud is an awesome app.I especially like the styles you can use and all you need to do is to write three or more lines of character traits.Tag cloud is awesome .

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  7. Plot, character, conflict, theme setting yes these are the five things that your gonna be needing whats a short story thats mad exciting. love this rap it helps you if your writing a short story.

    Happy Blogging:)

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  8. WOW I enjoy making the jumping frog and it doesn't very jump high and go anywhere but it's still cool doing I just love it.

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  9. Hi , everyone , today I wrote about playing hard , It was about netball , Mrs t is proud about my writing and I have everything in it.

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  10. hey my name is jae boy I look at your blog and its awesome

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    Replies
    1. Welcome to our class community online jae boy

      Delete
  11. This writing is funky Mrs T it is exciting to be apart of and I can't wait to be finished with my song because it is rely groovy to write.

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  12. What have I noticed about the structure about the song.
    I have learnt how to write a song about Tutanakai and Hinemoa by comparing the bizarre song to ours.
    I can't wait to I make to a real song:].
    What have you noticed?.

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  13. What have I noticed about the structure of the song.
    I have noticed that when you want to say something you go on to a new line.
    I have also learnt that in paragraph three they have eight lines in their song.
    What have you noticed?.

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  14. What I Have Noticed About The Structure Of The Song.
    I have noticed that in the second and third paragraph there is one line and then the next line will have a word that rhymes with the previous line. The rhyming is for effect.The song is just like our writing because it has a begining that sets the scene, a middle that has a plot and a problem and also a ending that has a solution. The chorus repeats also for effect. Finally he has the who, what and even a where, he also has put in metaphors.

    This is what I noticed, what did you notice?

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  15. Kuini-Marnie Te Tomo22 September 2014 at 18:05

    I've notice that the lyrics are structured like a poem,i've also noticed that there is rhyme in the song.

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    Replies
    1. Kuini it's rhyming cause theres more than one rhyme in the lyrics.

      Delete
  16. what I noticed about the how bizarre lyrics is that it rhymes in different ways, sometimes the rhyme is directly in the line below or even in the line underneath it. The way he said it sometimes makes it rhyme in a different way.

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  17. What I noticed about how bizarre lyrics is that it rhymes in different ways, the rhyme is in the line and the line below it. The way OMC sings it, it sometimes has words that don't rhyme and when you sing it, it does rhyme.

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  18. Show not tell!
    What I do well,
    I use simple language to add detail,
    I use speech to help me describe the subject.
    I need to include:
    Some complex language, to help me describe whats happening.
    What I found interesting:
    How the person in the video showed her feelings, instead of just saying her feelings.
    I need to practise:
    Taking the feeling out of my sentence and putting words that mean the same thing, to add detail.

    What do you need to improve at?

    ReplyDelete
  19. What I noticed?
    I noticed that the girls in the video use words that describes an action. For example.

    Angry:
    Red face
    Squeezing your fist together
    Scrunching your face up.

    I noticed that show not tell can be used in story writing, writing and poetry to make a sentence or story more descriptive.

    Showing not telling can be used in different structures of writing. You can use a sentence like (I am happy) and make it sound more interesting by describing how the person is happy. For example.

    The girl dances around the room with a big bright smile on her face.
    You show how your feeling, not telling how you feel.

    How can you make others see what your saying not telling them directly?

    Use this sentence to make it sound more interesting using your strategy. Describe the action.

    I am excited

    Good luck:)

    ReplyDelete
  20. Kuini-Marnie Te Tomo12 October 2014 at 18:38

    Show not tell :)
    What I already do well:
    I am good at making my sentences descriptive.

    What will I include:
    I will need to include showing my feelings,not to tell my feelings.

    What I found interesting:
    What I found interesting was that in the video they turned a 3 word sentence into a ten word sentence.

    What I need to practise/or what I may need help on:
    I need to practise on adding action into my story/sentence.

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  21. I have to show, not tell in my writing better because it becomes more descriptive. I also need to make sure my writing makes sense.

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  22. How I Show Not Tell
    The things I do well are
    - I explain the feeling I am describing to give the reader clues. eg. sad- tears filled my eyes.

    What I need to include
    -I need to include detail in my writing by explaining what the character does and their facial expressions to describe feelings.

    What I found interesting
    - Using actions and facial expressions to show an emotion was interesting because using them shows the reader feelings and adds detail to hook the reader in.

    What I need practise
    - I need to practise how to explain their voice and facial expressions to describe feelings and show not tell to hook the reader in.
    This is what I'm good at and what I'm going practise, what are you going to practise?

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  23. Mrs T I need help with finding what website it is to use google docs or google slides.

    ReplyDelete
  24. Show,not tell.What did I notice?Showing,not telling is a kind of skill that is very important for your writing and you should try to show someones emotions and feelings by describing the characters actions.The actions tell us the meaning of the story and whats going to happen next.

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  25. What I need to work on is
    Putting capital letter in the right place
    Adding description
    Showing the reader without directly telling them my idea
    Double check
    Making sure there are no spelling mistakes

    What I though that was interesting
    She described what she was doing. She did not tell the reader she show the reader.

    what I am good at is
    Putting punctuation in the right place

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  26. Show Not Tell !
    What I already do well is
    ~ I add specific words like adjectives, nouns and verbs.
    ~ I use dialogue/speech when I'm trying to say something and I use hook ins at the beginning of the sentence or story.

    What I need to include in my writing is
    ~ Using action like facial expression and body language so its showing you more and not telling you.
    ~ Descriptive sentences and feelings so my writing is more detailed.

    What did I find interesting?
    What I found interesting was when the two girls in the video gave us advice about show not tell by using simple words and sentences then putting more detail into them that makes it sound interesting.

    What I need practise with is
    ~ Using more actions and feelings.
    ~ Painting a complete picture in the readers mind.




















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  27. What I noticed? Show not tell
    In the video the girls said when you're using the skill, show not tell, you're trying to show you're feelings, not tell them.For example:she slouched in her chair while she trembled and sobbed.
    What I already do well?
    I'm good at adding interrupted sentences by adding specific words to my sentences.
    What I need practise with?
    I need help with adding show, not tell sentences in my writing.

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  28. People are working so hard by thinking out the box and the video helps you get an example to
    add more to the sentence
    good job

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  29. Wow! I'm exited to write this brochure it's going to be fun.

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  30. Bert was a confident bird , he tried and tried no matter what and never gave up. He chose to do it so when he was jumping down he covered his eyes. He splashed into the water. His friends were waiting down there his friends were saying affirmations to Bert. He went up again with his friends. This time he done proper.

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  31. Here's some questions I would like you to ask Bob graham
    How did you get the perfect name for heaven
    How did you get the perfect colour for the bus
    How did you know that bus will help the people in town
    How did you know the girl was going to take care of it
    How did you know it was the perfect bus for the people

    ReplyDelete